Duncan - The Reality of Depression: "It's not laziness, it's because you are struggling"

Duncan Crawford is a 54-year-old General Practitioner Assistant Manager from Edinburgh. He has been impacted by depression throughout his life. Duncan explains in this interview how his depression has personally affected him, his experience with counselling, and how society needs to change its outlook on mental health conditions.

He first recalls struggling with his mental health during university:

“I just had a bit of a meltdown towards the end, but I put that down to just being exam stress. I didn’t really do anything about it then, I just sort of left it. Slowly but surely, it caught up with me later on.”

However, Duncan then describes how he began to severely struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts. He notes that his mental health was most significantly impacted around 8 years ago and explains the various reasons why he began to feel this way:

Duncan attended counselling in the past, and he feels as though it has been beneficial for him:

Duncan expresses how being able to open up about these topics was a significant relief:

“It made me realise that a lot of things were not your fault when you were a kid – because it feels like everything is your fault. However, it takes time to work through that yourself, because that is what a counsellor does, a counsellor does not just wave a magic wand. They basically guide you through being able to work out what has happened.”

He also admits finding it difficult to open up to his loved ones about his mental health:

“To be fair I find it hardest talking to my family about it, particularly with my wife. I find that quite difficult because I don’t want to burden her with that. However, talking to someone who is not related to you, who you go to see then you go away, I found that easier.”

Duncan also believes there are some misconceptions regarding depression:

Regarding Duncan’s youth, mental health was never something that was openly discussed:

“It was just never talked about, you would be told ‘Oh you are fine just get on with it’, the usual thing in the 70s. Society at that time didn’t really talk about stuff like that.”

He then goes on to address how he has faced stigma in the past due to his mental health, especially in his old workplace:

Expanding on the work environment, Duncan addresses why he thinks people's workload is a reason why mental health conditions in Scotland have increased:

“I would say it is the financial situation people find themselves in. You have got couples both working full time and who still can’t make their ends meet, which is massively stressful. In terms of work there is people holding down three or four jobs, mortgages have gone up hugely, rent has gone up.”

The workplace is an area that Duncan thinks needs improvement, as he believes there is more that can be done to create a better environment for those with mental health conditions:

Circling back to Covid-19, the pandemic has contributed to poor mental health according to Duncan:

“Obviously we have just had the pandemic, a lot of people really struggled with that and were worried about losing people. Lots of people also lost their jobs because of it and it is still affecting a lot of businesses as well.”

He also addresses the lengthy waiting lists to access mental health support, and how this can further impact people’s well-being:

Regarding mental health support, Duncan also believes that there is still a priority placed on physical health:

“Mental health is not given the same impetus as any physical illness. If you break an arm, somebody will fix it. If you break your head, you need to wait.”

There is also a lack of education about depression and anxiety according to Duncan. He believes this would generate more awareness about mental health:

“There needs to be more education on depression and anxiety, because they feed off each other. It is not laziness, it is because you are struggling. There was never any mention of it in school. I think there is some now, but it could still be better in terms of letting kids understand what it feels like to be anxious, and how to cope with that through stuff like breathing exercises.”

Duncan's story highlights that there is still progress to be made towards a better-accepting future. Depression is a highly serious topic which should not be overlooked or taken lightly. It is increasingly important to actively listen to stories like Duncan's to reduce the stigma surrounding mental health conditions.